A few pictures came my way. It was a friendly gesture, offered in a you-may-be-interested-in-seeing-these kind of way.
It shouldn’t have been a big deal. But sometimes, what shouldn’t be a big deal is anyway.
It was of a party I wouldn’t have been welcome to attend. Suddenly, I was seeing other pictures in my head, of other parties I wasn’t welcome at. Those old feelings of rejection, being shunned and disowned, started washing over me. All the hurt, pain, and anger. Being “a disappointment.” Tainted. Misjudged. Unclean. Like it was happening again in real-time.
I felt myself starting to detach. Instead of giving in, I took a deep breath and forced myself to focus on the present. I grit my teeth just a bit and managed to keep a pleasant tone in my voice.
“Ohhhhh, that’s a nice picture,” I said, pleasantly enough.
I don’t like to let my feelings spill onto others. It’s messy, and it makes you vulnerable. Scorpio Mars ain’t having none of that. But the loss still lingers and can hit hard, unexpectedly.
Which brings us to next week…
Next Week in the Cards
In a word, ouch!
The outlook is the Five of Cups. Expect a sense of loss or grieving to cast a shadow over the week. But there’s hope. The Eight of Swords reminds us that we’ve got more options than we realize. We’re just holding ourselves back.
Cards pictured from my well-loved Legacy of the Divine deck.
People may be feeling some losses this week. Maybe even you. Look at your reactions–that Eight of Swords is always a self-made web.
I can’t tell you how to look at things, but I can tell you that how you’re looking at things is intimately connected to the sense of loss you feel. Your sense of vulnerability and fear of causing yourself more pain is what is keeping you from changing the situation.
Tread lightly this week with others, but even more so with yourself. There’s likely to be a rawness in the energetic weather, and self-love is the best home remedy we’ve got.
Y’all will have to excuse me while I put down this mirror and read my own damn columns.
Much love! And stay safe out there.
