Tarot in Real Life: Queen’s Work Never Done!

“There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. “
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I draw for Everyday Tarot, I don’t ask for a personal message, although often I get one. I laughed, realizing this was the case when I pulled the Queen of Pentacles recently.

The Queen has long been what I consider a “personal card.” I have that Earthy, maternal vibe about me. Come to my house, and I will feed you! It’s what I do. So I always take extra note when this particular queen shows up.

Right now, I’m surrounded by multiple incarnations of “Mother.” The most dramatic–my Leo girl is home, following a year and a half far away. I’m finding it doesn’t take long to revisit that “Mom” place in your head. Not that I quit being a mom entirely of course, but it’s a much different experience without children nearby. The “Mother’s Brain” quiets some in ignorance of growing pains. You divert attention and keep on living, redecorating the now-empty nest.

As I’m telling my own mother, she’s telling me they are preparing to move away again. I get a twang of mixed feelings and sadness, because it’s all but physically impossible to stop feeling I eternally disappoint her. No one’s fault or plan, but still, my reality. We accept this and love each other, anyway.

The Queen does highlight my path of the last few of years–over and again, I’ve found myself choosing whom and how I will mother. Be it with family, friends or even Tarot clients, the caretaking questions remain salient. I’m mostly comfortable with where the answers have landed, but I know, there are more layers to delve. Reviewing lessons, just as I”m moving into the end of my own reproductive cycle. On cue? I’m thinking, yeah.

At one point in my life, awareness of a need for mothering would have been all it took for me to feel compelled to mother. Now, though, I’m far more selfish in evaluating. I ask, “Is this my responsibility? What is the cost, to me and my loved ones? Am I up for doing the job, well and as long as needed?” I don’t think I’m somehow less, that I have a bigger list of considerations now. I’ve just discovered (for me, at least), there’s a bottom to the wellspring of maternal compassion–a realization simultaneously disturbing and relieving, if you want to know the truth. It’s hard work being endlessly giving, man.

What I do know–for those whom I mother in whatever capacity, I’ll give my best. I can’t imagine doing anything less. Perhaps that’s good cause to be discriminating. I want my energy to matter, however I spend it. And as we’ve been saying, that trusting others to care for themselves thing? Total act of faith. I’m coming by more of that, everyday.

You feeling maternal?