“Food, love, career, and mothers, the four major guilt groups.” –Cathy Guisewite
It’s becoming apparent to me, I’m in one of those infamous “transitional phases.” Damn it to Hell, anyway! I’d prefer to teleport directly to the destination, thank you very much. That’s exactly what I tell myself.
And then I think, “Yeah. Good luck with that, Dixie.”
Today’s Tarot is “Memories of Love,” better known as the Six of Cups or Lord of Pleasure, associated with Sun in Scorpio. We saw the Osho Zen take on this card rather recently.
This version from the Psychic Tarot Oracle drives me a little bit insane; there are only four candles pictures instead of six, and the green borders i for Tarot Cups (ostensibly to correspond with the Heart Chakra) always makes me think of Pentacles. Cups are supposed to be Water Element blue, damnit! But that’s not the point. It does capture the general mood of fond remembrance.
The Six of Cups is all about nostalgia, trust, and innocence. It hearkens back to a simpler time, without those complications that seem to collect in our lives. It resonates with me as I take stock of my relationship with motherhood.
As a young woman, I had no interest in becoming a mother. “Children aren’t any good until they’re old enough to threaten!” was my oft-repeated, half-serious quip. But I found myself in love with a man who had children—young, very much in need of mothering. I vowed to do my best to be the mom they didn’t have. I became pregnant myself, and the course was irrevocably laid in. I had no clue what I was signing on for, but once I committed, that was it. Some jobs you just don’t half-ass.
Loss of innocence is a recurring theme, but the innocence lost was mine! I learned you cannot assume that “everything will work out okay,” although you can often help support positive outcomes. I learned you cannot save your children from pain, and even if you could, you probably shouldn’t. I learned children don’t become just whom you raise them to be; much more so, they become whom they choose to be. This fact is simultaneously reassuring and terrifying.
Therein lies the crux. With my “children” no longer children, the limitations of a mother’s role have become apparent. At a time when I’ve started channeling maternal energy other ways, I don’t see revelations as irrelevant coincidence. It’s training. Seeing a need is not the same as obligation to answer it. Encouragement and perspective are often more valuable than solutions.
Giving purely, with love, IS absolutely enough. Because it has to be. The rest doesn’t belong to me. But I’ll be cheering the loudest, anyway.
What lessons have you found in motherhood?
|The Psychic Tarot Oracle Cards: a 65-Card Deck, plus booklet! |
by John Holland
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